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Socializing on Social Sites and Searching For Love

Bellaisa / January 31, 2012 / Find Love /0 Comments

Hiding and Time - Two Obstacles To Finding Love

If YOU are reading this right now, and you are single and looking, then I have some advice for you that you may, or may not, need. But it’s crucial advice in order for you to find love.

Lately I’ve been trying to build up my online presense and I’ve made one important discovery! People can’t find you unless you get out there and show yourself off!

I had been avoiding social sites because I found they took up a lot of time. Unfortunately what I didn’t know is that they take up a lot of time – but it’s worth it! The more social you are online, the more people get to know you. You get friended more, circled more, dugg more, stumbled upon more – the more you build your online presence up the more you gain in way of visitors and friends.

So, it hit me that this related to dating as well.

If you are sitting behind the computer, looking for love, and you are reading this then you are spending your time unwisely. Although, this is a pretty good reminder about what you should be doing, but still there is something better that you could be doing!

Showing yourself off! Making your presence known!

The more people who see you and know you are alive, the more chances you have at finding someone who is perfect for you. The less you interact with other people, get out there, and socialize – the less people see you. It’s just common sense.

There may be some things holding you back from doing it.

Fear – Huge holder backer. Fear is what makes us not even try. But conquering fear is a feeling like no other. Pushing past fear is the only way to reach what you want. If you stay in your comfort zone for the rest of your life then you will never get anything besides what falls into your comfort zone. And love may always just be out of reach!

Rejection – Rejection does hurt the ego, but that’s about it! It won’t kill you, and what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger! That’s what rejection does. Each time you get rejected you learn something about your technique, approach, or social skills. Then you take what you learn, improve upon it, and get back out there! Getting rejected by 20 people is not going to affect your chances with the other millions of people out there. It’s going to improve them!

Time – If time is your excuse then you are lying! Because you are skimming the internet right now and you are reading this, and this takes some time to read. You can go out for coffee and take your to-do list with you. You can hop onto online dating and make a profile that catches everyone’s attention. You can wake up an hour earlier and go to bed an hour later! Time is on your side if you let it be. Find the time to get out there and show yourself off, or even just get on a dating website and show yourself off there. You can do that from anywhere – anytime.

Speaking of time…I gotta go. I just wanted to let you know that if you are looking for love then you have to get out there. You have to! You can’t expect people to know who you are if you don’t’ show your face a little.

Good luck!

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Looking For Love

Bellaisa / January 19, 2012 / Find Love /2 Comments

Looking For Love Can Be a Scary Thing!

No wonder there are so many people looking for love.

Love is something that we all deserve in life. Love gives you wings. Yes, I may have stolen that from a red bull commercial, but it’s true. When you are loved you have support in your life and someone to encourage you to be happier. You have a permanent cheerleader in your life, and it feels good to know that someone always has your back.

If you are single and looking for love then you are probably aware of how hard it is to really get out there and find someone who is going to be a perfect match for you. There are so many stressful parts when it comes to looking for love and if it becomes too much stress on you then you may just give up altogether. But don’t do that!

The Approach

The approach is probably one of the scariest parts of looking for love. You see someone you like and you want to get to know them better, but you have to actually make contact with someone and put yourself at risk for rejections. Nobody likes to be rejected.

What you have to remember is that even if you do get rejected, at least you tried. You don’t want to live your life with regrets about missing out on the perfect guy or girl for you. When you are actively looking for love – you will feel better by putting yourself out there and giving it a go.

Plus, every rejection that you get will teach you something about yourself. It can be hard to look at it this way when you are in the thick of a rejection, but hindsight will tell you why you got rejected and you can avoid doing that on your next approach.

Then again, you may not get rejected at all! It may be worth every skipped heartbeat and every off-balance step you take. So just go for it! Push through the anxiety or fear and take a chance on love.

Making the Call

This is where you take 50 tries to pick up the phone and call someone you like, but hang up every single try. It’s hard to get the courage up to give that person a call. Here are some tips to help you out.

Remember that they are probably waiting for your call, maybe even anticipating it.
They will be just as nervous as you are so they will probably not sense your inability to form complete sentences like you normally do.
Talk about things that relate to you two – like where you met, your first conversation, any interests that you know you share. Keep the conversation relevant to what you two connected on and it will go much smoother.

Going on a Date

What should I wear? Where should we go? Will he or she like me? These are things that you commonly worry about before you go on the date. But once you start the date all that worry fly’s out the window and you begin to relax a little. It’s the anticipation of the first date that causes the most anxiety.

If you are looking for love then you will want the date to go as smoothly as possible. You don’t want to lay your whole life story out on the line – just the stuff that is relevant to right now and that makes you look good, and makes your date want to know you better. This means don’t talk about no-no topics like your ex or your weird habit, because your date may become annoyed or turned off and avoid a second date. Wait until you form a solid connection to let them know the real you.

Following Up

If you feel like you have no more reason to go looking for love (meaning you found the person you’ve been looking for) then you are going to want to get in contact with them again. The way you do that could make or break your chances of getting to another date. Here are some tips to do it properly.

Do call if you want to tell them that you enjoyed the date and would like to get together again. If you don’t call then they may become unsure of whether or not you really enjoyed their company or not.
Don’t call 20 times after that just to check up on whether they want to get together again. If you called once then the ball is now in their court. Chill out and wait to see what happens.
Do keep yourself busy because waiting for someone to call can drive you insane, and cause you to do stupid things (like text them 20 times)
Don’t play games by not returning their call or waiting a certain amount of days to call them back – if you do this you may lose your shot of another date.

Bottom line: Looking for love may be a scary thing, but if you face your fears and go through each process, the payoff of a loving relationship will be worth the effort.

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Want To Find Love? Stop Looking So Hard!

Bellaisa / December 2, 2011 / Find Love /11 Comments

How To Find Love – The Kind You Really Want!

This is probably you. You want to find love, real love. Someone who treats you really good, understands you, and falls more in love with you every day, and vice-versa.

When you want to find love in a bad way you can make a few mistakes though. You can become desperate to find love and start taking anyone who comes along! This is not a one-time thing either!

When you really want to find love you often start to NEED it. You want it for so bad and for so long that it starts to become something you feel you need to the very core.

Why Needing to Find Love is a Bad Thing

Normally our needs are met very easily. We need butter; we go to the store and get it. We need a new refrigerator; we go the store and get it. We can normally satisfy our needs quickly and easily. But when it comes to finding love that need is not something that we can control so easily! And thus our need for love turns into desperation for love, almost as if love is being withheld from us and we can’t do anything to change that.

This is why you have to stop needing to find love so much if you want to find love that is truly going to make you happy! If you need it to the point of being desperate then you are going to take any old loser that comes your way and try to conform them into what you want. You trick yourself into thinking that you have found this perfect love that you have needed for so long, but in fact it’s normally quite the opposite. Then when you break-up you want to find love again – and the cycle continues until you finally surrender and let the need go.

I know this personally, as I think most people do! I needed to find love so bad that I dated many guys that I thought could give me that love. I normally got into the relationship too fast and didn’t actually get to know them to see if they were really what I wanted. This always resulted in find a jerk instead of finding love.

How To Find Love – The Right Way

It wasn’t until I stopped needing to find love that I actually found a guy who was perfect for me. When the desperation was gone I was able to see what real love was all about and I was also able to see the qualities I wanted in a guy much clearer – and I was also able to wait for them!

So if you want to find love and you feel a sense of desperation attached to that feeling then stop! Start believing that love will find you and stop seeking it out every day. Once you do this you will be surprised at how quickly love will show up – just keep your eyes open!

The Law of Attraction and Finding Love

Just as a quick side note: If you believe in the law of attraction then you will understand that being desperate for love will never get you the love you are looking for.

The law of attraction says that you attract what you are focusing on. When you are desperate for love you are focusing on the fact that you haven’t found love or that you are not able to find love. You are focusing on the lack of love in your life. THAT is what you are attracting to you! The lack of love!

So if you are saying things like “I never find someone decent!” or “I have such a hard time finding someone!” or anything else that is negative then you are going to keep getting more of that in your life.

Try saying “Love is coming to me!” or “My perfect match is right around the corner!” and you will be aligning yourself to attract love to yourself in a better way.

Even if you don’t believe in the law of attraction – it’s worth a try. I mean you do want to find love right? I just gave you a really good way on how to find love and it’s worth a shot. Trying being positive about finding love.

If you are serious about transforming your attraction to the opposite sex, then I recommend checking out the Ultimate Attraction Transformation Series by Meet Your Sweet. You will learn what it really takes to be your best self possible and you will go through an attraction makeover – ready for love on the other side!